Showing posts with label women's rights. Show all posts
Showing posts with label women's rights. Show all posts

7 Apr 2016

A Snapshot of Religion Related Child Abuse From June 2007 to June 2011



A Snapshot of Religion Related Child Abuse From June 2007 to June 2011

Somewhere right now children are suffering because of religious superstition, tradition and dogma

by Perry Bulwer



The first news article in this archive is dated June 6, 2007, the last one June 10, 2011. Those coincidental dates encompassing four years almost to the day were not planned by me. I had no end date or goal in mind when I began this archive, and when I recently decided to stop updating it I had no idea the dates of the first and last article would coincide in that way. But they do, providing a sort of symmetry or framework for this snapshot of child abuse in religious environments. [Update February 2024: After June 2011 I stopped creating new pages in this archive, but I continued to add news articles in the comment sections of existing pages.]

I refer to this archive as a snapshot because it contains specific news articles within a specific time frame, but like a photographic snapshot it captures only those I had a quick opportunity to archive. Obviously, this is not a complete picture of religiously motivated child abuse, but just one small part of it. For each of the more than three thousand articles that appear in this archive there are many more from that same period that are not included. I only added articles I found in the various online newspapers I read everyday, the various email alerts I set up on the subject, or a few times by readers who submitted links to me. I did not otherwise go out of my way to find relevant articles, but just entered articles I easily found, much like the way I take photographs.

Not only were there other relevant articles during that four years that are not included in this archive, I did not add articles published prior to that period except in a few cases where those articles easily came to my attention. For example, Rolling Stone republished online an older article on Scientology in the wake of recent scandals.  Also not in this archive are the numerous, individual stories of religion related child abuse occurring daily around the world that never get reported. See the list below for ways in which millions of children every year are denied their human rights, cruelly mistreated, harmed or killed for religious reasons (for example: every year 3 million girls in Africa alone have their genitals mutilated).  As Carl Sagan wrote, it is a demon-haunted world we live in and somewhere right now children are suffering because of religious superstitions, traditions and dogmas.

Such child abuse is as old as religion itself (it is one of the main ways religion is propagated)  and will be a problem as long as believers and their institutions are afforded privileges and exemptions to indoctrinate and otherwise abuse children. Although a few of the articles here do discuss that ancient history of religious child abuse, and some consider the problem of how to end such abuse in the future, most deal with specific abuses and court cases that occurred during that four year period. So, as I said, this archive is a snapshot, but no less informative for being so. It contains a representative sample of child abuse in all the major religions and some smaller ones, some Judaic, Islamic and Christian denominations and sects, many cults and quasi-religious groups, as well as semi-secular institutions such as the Boy Scouts  and some delinquent teen boot-camps  that are not as overtly religious as most, but contain religious elements.

Although I won't be updating this archive, at least for the foreseeable future, the site will remain open. There is much valuable information here that can be useful in a variety of ways. You can find, for example, specific information on perpetrators and the groups they belong to, tactics and characteristics common to abusive individuals or groups, personal stories about and by abuse survivors and their recovery, information on court cases, contact information for advocacy groups and lawyers, and much more. That is one of the reasons I archived entire news articles rather than just excerpts and links. When I first started I discovered other bloggers and news aggregators focusing on religion, but very often links they provided were dead soon after they were posted, the excerpts they published left out crucial details or the articles quickly disappeared behind firewalls. So, I have archived articles in their entirety and include the link to where I found the article so that all of the information remains available to anyone.

Keeping this archive updated has not been easy. It can be quite depressing reading daily about innocent children who are indoctrinated, mistreated, exploited, assaulted, molested, raped, tortured or murdered, or are denied their human rights, either directly or indirectly because of religion. However, contrary to the popular misconception held by many believers, it is religiously motivated child abuse that depresses me, not the atheistic worldview I now hold, which provides more morality, meaning and purpose to my life than Christianity ever did because it is based on reality. So, that is one reason I'm ending this archive. I cry inside every time I read another story of children suffering because of the religious beliefs of adults. Sometimes I just can't bear to read another one. It's getting too hard on my heart.

Another reason is that it is time consuming. I did not simply skim read each article, I dwelt on them in detail to understand the underlying issues and make connections to similar stories of religious child abuse. But time is the most precious thing anyone has since this life is all we know. There is no second life. I have other projects I need to devote my time to now, but that does not mean I am turning my back on this issue. I will continue to expose religion related child abuse in my own writings on my blog Chain the Dogma when I have some insights or personal experience and knowledge in relation to particular news. It will be sporadic though, not on a daily or weekly basis, at least until I have finished some of those others projects I mentioned. The story of religion and child abuse is a never-ending one, so there will always be more articles that could be added to this archive. In fact, as I was writing the previous paragraph I received a news update on a Hindu Guru from Texas who fled to Mexico after being found guilty of sexually assaulting girls.  I was tempted to add this latest article to the others here on that same story,  but I need to stop somewhere, which means that some of the stories related in these articles have not yet been concluded.

Some stories archived here have concluded and you can find articles covering them from beginning to end. For example, the Elizabeth Smart case concluded with guilty verdicts for her abductors. But no one expects the Catholic clergy crimes scandals to end any time soon. While much abuse has been exposed in North America and Europe, and there are many different legal actions taking place,  it is likely just the tip of the iceberg as clergy abuse in Africa  and Latin America  has received little attention yet. So that is an obvious on-going story.

Other court cases are still continuing as well. Some notable ones are the Canadian constitutional case considering the validity of the law prohibiting polygamy,  which will likely take years to reach the Supreme Court of Canada. Related to that is the Warren Jeffs case  and other Mormon fundamentalist members of the FLDS  (evidence from Jeffs' case in Texas was submitted to the Canadian court hearing the constitutional case).  Like wise, I just read another update on the Tony Alamo case indicating that although he is now in prison and survivors have won civil suits against him, he has successfully hidden much of his ministries assets,  which means those survivors will be fighting legal battles for years to come to get their court-ordered compensation.

Other recent news that just missed my cut-off date for this archive includes reports that a cult leader from Australia, Agape Ministries pastor Rocco Leo Agape, was arrested in Fiji. Articles in this archive report that when he fled Australia several children went missing.  I have not found any reports indicating whether or not those children have been found, but the articles archived here  do provide basic information for anyone interested in doing follow-up research on this continuing story. And just as I was about to publish this article, news arrived that cult leader, Wayne Bent, imprisoned for sex abuse  of girls  has had his conviction overturned on a technicality and will be released from jail. So while this archive will not contain the ending to those and similar stories, it will provide much of the background and make it easier to find follow-up articles.

One way to find articles, besides the search tool, is to use the labels listed at the end of  the side-bar. Unfortunately, there are still several hundred articles in the middle of this archive that do not yet have any label associated with them. Still, the labels can be useful for finding specific groups or specific issues, just use the search tool to find any additional unlabelled articles. Also, for the last year and a half or so I added a Related Articles section at the end of each article. It contains links to other articles in the archive that are either earlier stories on the same subject or similar in some way, making your search much easier. I'll list here those labels dealing with the different ways children are abused and then set out some of the main themes you will find throughout this archive.

These are some of the ways children are abused as reported in the news articles here:


abandonment, abduction, assault, bigotry, child brides, child labour, child sacrifice, child soldiers, child trafficking, circumcision, confinement, corporal punishment, cruelty, discrimination, endangerment, exorcism, exploitation, extremism, forced fasting, forced marriage, hate, honour killing, incest, indoctrination, infanticide, institutional abuse, intellectual abuse, intimidation, isolation, lying, manipulation, manslaughter, medical neglect, molestation, murder, neglect, pedophilia, physical abuse, pornography, prostitution, psychological abuse, racism, rape, ritual abuse, seclusion, secrecy, sexual abuse, sexual exploitation, shunning, sorcery, spiritual abuse, suicide, terrorism, torture, totalitarian, vaccination, witchcraft.


Here are a few of the general themes you will find in this archive, with links to a few examples. I'm sure you can find many others. Note that these categories are not exclusive. Much of the abuse reported in this archive fits into two or more of these themes, sometimes all of them.


Education, indoctrination and intellectual abuse:

One of the primary ways in which children's rights are violated in religious environments is by indoctrination. Instead of granting their children the same right to religious freedom that they want for themselves, many parents  indoctrinate  them before they are able to make their own informed decision on whether to believe or not. Young children are also targeted for indoctrination by religious institutions, especially by fundamentalists,  evangelicals,  Catholics  and Anglicans,  but also by cults  like Scientology. The beliefs and doctrines of those groups are so irrational that the best way to get new recruits is to manipulate the minds of children and teens who are unable to defend themselves from lies and superstitions with reason. In my opinion, that is immoral spiritual abuse. The educational rights of children  are also undermined when they are intellectually abused with biblical literalism,  anti-science creationism  or denied the right to attend university.


Physical abuse:

Of course, there is an awful lot of physical child abuse that is not related to religion. Children are easy targets. But it is more than just sad when religion is used to justify assaulting children,  it is immoral  and criminal.  Corporal punishment takes many forms ranging from slaps to torture.  In my opinion, even a slap is an affront to the dignity of a child, or any human for that matter. Spanking children is not necessary. There are better ways to train children than hitting them, so why do believers who claim to have superior morals to those of unbelievers think it is okay to assault vulnerable children? If a slap is ok, why not a punch,  or a beating,  or a whipping,  or water torture,  or other tortures?  Some believers don't know where to draw the line and children suffer or die.  I also include medical neglect  under this theme because it often leads to immense physical suffering   and many times death. Medical neglect includes the failure of parents to protect their children, and consequently other children, from deadly diseases by refusing to vaccinate them.

Sexual abuse:


Sadly, the majority of articles here deal with the sexual abuse of children and teenagers. It will surprise no one that Catholic clergy figure prominently here. Some of the vilest sex abuse you will read in these articles was committed by Catholic priests and nuns. A few examples: the priest who molested or raped around 200 deaf boys; the founder of the influential Legionaires order, Marcel Macial,  who sexually assaulted young seminarians and fathered several children who he also sexually abused; Mother Teresa's failure  to recognize despite many obvious warning signs that her spiritual adviser, an esteemed Jesuit priest,  was a notorious pedophile abusing teen boys in her retreats and nunneries; the priest who raped children in their own homes while their parents were in another room;  the priest who molested girls in the confessional booth and raped hypnotized boys;  priests  and nuns who sexually terrorized aboriginal children in North American  residential schools that were designed to assimilate them; the Belgian bishop who molested his two nephews and then went on TV to justify his actions; and much much more.

Of course, Catholic clergy are not the only ones who sexually abuse children. There are reports here on sexual crimes by clergy of various Protestant  denominations and sects, particularly Baptists, but also by AnglicansAmish,  Assemblies of GodPresbyteriansMennonites,  Mormons,  Jehovah's Witnesses  and others. There also numerous, smaller Christian sects and cults represented here where the leaders committed various sexual crimes against children and teens. Some examples of those include The Family International  previously known as the Children of GodTony Alamo MinistriesWayne Bent's cult; and the House of YahwehHindu gurus  and Buddhist monks are also among the clergy abusers reported here, though not to the extent of other groups. That may be partly because I did not scan newspapers from Asia as often as from other areas.

Much of the sex abuse that occurs in the various groups listed above takes the form of direct assaults in which an offender molests or rapes children. In some, however, the sexual crimes take the form of institutionalized abuse, such as the forced 'marriages' of child brides in groups practising polygamy like the Mormon fundamentalist group FLDS and Tony Alamo Ministries , or the sexualization of children in The Family International. Those three Christian sects practise polygamy and engaged, or still do, in child trafficking for sexual purposes, not unlike what happens in some Muslim  and Hindu  communities. Sometimes those communities are entire nations, which can lead to the bizarre situation in Saudi Arabia where adult women do not have the freedom to marry who they want, but adult males can 'marry' 10 year old girls. Child sex abusers, whether individuals or institutions, often turn to religion for justification. However, dogmas and rituals intended to provide religious respectability do not make forced marriages of children, or any other kind of child abuse, any less a crime.


Psychological and spiritual abuse:


The intellectual, physical and sexual abuses I've discussed so far can also fit into this theme of psychological and spiritual abuse. For example, when a priest or other religious leader rapes or molests a child, it is not just sexually abusive, it is also spiritually abusive because of their religious relationship with the child. And it is psychologically abusive because of the emotional pain and confusion a sexual assault by a trusted authority figure causes. Here is how one woman who was raised in a Mormon fundamentalist community describes it:

In addition to being physically abused, Jensen told the court that she had also been sexually abused as a child in Bountiful. But, voice thick with tears, Jensen said the emotional abuse was worse.
"The unworthiness, the never being good enough, the not having a parent who was accessible to talk to when things happened to you that you couldn't explain it. Even if you had the courage to bring it up, it was disclaimed as God's will. You must have done something wrong.

"It was the self-loathing. The hopelessness of thinking that you're never going to get out and it's never going to get any better so you might as well give up and let them do whatever they wanted to you."

Spiritual abuse also occurs when religious leaders neglect to protect children from abusers and then use denial,  deceit  and secrecy  to cover-up their failures in order to protect their position and institution. Catholic leaders have shuffled known pedophile priests around the globe, lied to or concealed information from congregations about reassigned priests, used the doctrine of mental reservation  to lie about abuse, blamed children for causing their own abuse, asked survivors to swear oaths of secrecy  or sign confidentiality agreements, refused to compensate survivors  unless forced to by courts, used bankruptcies  to hide assets from survivors, and continue to fight legal reforms that would end or extend time limits, which would allow many more survivors of clergy abuse to seek justice and compensation through the legal system. Here is a Catholic describing how she was betrayed by the Catholic hierarchy's neglect and cover-ups:


It is a true test of faith, to try to remain in the Catholic Church knowing all that has happened, not only in Philadelphia but throughout the world, with clergy sex-abuse scandals. It is like everything I once believed, has been turned upside down, inside out.
The trust that has been broken is almost too great, the betrayal runs so deep. As a child, I was taught to look toward the clergy as an example of what is good and holy, and now I find I have had to tell my children to look away.
...
I was taught from a young age that as a Catholic, I needed to be careful to not fall prey to the corruption and evil that exists in the secular world around us. But this time the threat comes from within the church. The problems of the outside world have never shaken my beliefs the way the church itself has done in recent years.
I was also taught to speak out against injustice and all that is wrong, and so I do; however it is against all that I have ever known and believed. So for now, I remain, wanting to walk away, but in doing so feeling like I would be abandoning all that the Catholic Church has destroyed.
I recently used the term “Catholic orphan” to describe my status in the church. I feel I have no leadership, no trust, the hierarchy continues to mislead and tries to put a spin on a vile situation.

It is not just the Catholic hierarchy that has spiritually abused their congregation by failing to protect children from abusers in their midst. MormonsBaptistsOrthodox Jewish groups,  Lutherans,  and many other religious groups have inadequate child protection policies and practices. And it is not just groups, but sometimes entire nations that are unable to protect children from religiously motivated child abuse. Indonesia  is one example, as are several countries in Africa.

There are other kinds of psychological and spiritual abuses that do not involve sexual assaults. For example, many fundamentalist and orthodox beliefs are highly detrimental to children's minds. Creationism,  which also falls under intellectual abuse,  can cause cognitive dissonance in children once they are confronted with scientific facts. Apocalypticism  can cause children to needlessly fear and make irrational decisions. Biblical bigotry can cause children to hate others with different beliefs or no beliefs, the colour of their skin, or their sexual orientation. Or it can teach them to hate themselves if they were born homosexual but taught it is a sin  or that they have a demon that must be exorcisedChild custody disputes involving religion can cause emotional turmoil for children caught up in the conflicts of their parents. Religious exclusivity can isolate children from society.  The practice of shunning leads to the abandonment of children and separation of family members. In fact, all of the abuse covered in this archive has some element of psychological or spiritual abuse.


Ritual abuse:

I apply a very broad definition to the term ritual abuse. Certainly, there are many secular rituals, but they rarely become abusive. One obvious example is the hazing that occurs in college fraternities, military units, sports teams and other groups that initiate new recruits in that manner. Hazing is an inherently abusive ritual, just like some religious rituals, but it is harder to find examples of benign secular rituals used in abusive ways. On the other hand, I can think of many examples of religious ritual abuse.  Some religious rituals are inherently abusive, such as circumcision, while others can be both benign and abusive depending on how they are practiced.

Circumcision is one of the earliest forms of ritual abuse, and one of the most common.  It is similar to baptism in that it spiritually abuses little children who have it forced upon them, but unlike baptism it is also physically abusive. The ritual abuse of circumcision is an infringement of children's rights,  both the rights they hold as children, and their future rights as adults. Children have a right to religious freedom as set out in international human rights law. Religious freedom necessarily includes the right to be free from religion, otherwise it is an empty right, but when children are baptized or circumcised they are denied that right. Children also have an inherent right to an open future so that when they reach the appropriate age they are still free to make their own decisions regarding religion. Circumcision denies that right  even more than baptism, because a baptism can later be renounced whereas circumcision is a permanent mutilation of children's genitals for the sake of their parents' religious beliefs. Where circumcision is not performed as a religious ritual, it is still physically abusive since it is not medically necessary. In that case, it might be seen as another example of an abusive secular ritual. Unlike hazing, however, secular circumcision has deep religious roots.

Praying is a good example of a religious ritual that can be either benign or abusive. Even a seemingly benign ritual like praying can turn extremely abusive when it is used, for example, as a replacement for medical care. Picture a scenario where adults huddle around a child who is suffering immense pain  from an obvious medical problem. They pray fervently for days as the child's condition worsens, yet no one considers getting any kind of medical assistance. They just keep praying until the child dies or suffers irreparable harm. That is a clear case of ritual abuse.

Praying also becomes ritual abuse when it is used to promote hatred and violence. Here is an example of that as expressed by the leader of the bigoted family cult, Westboro Baptist Church, referring to the murder of an abortion provider. (This article is not in the archive)

Fred Phelps praised the shooter and said that he was doing God’s work. Phelps, who ran for political office several times as a Democrat in the 1990s, said, “Congresswoman Giffords, an avid supporter of sin and baby killing, was shot for that mischief…Westboro Baptist Church prays for more shooters...and more dead.”

Assassinating a member of Congress is not enough for another Baptist preacher who prays for the president's death:

Tempe, Arizona Independent Baptist preacher Steven Anderson has recently attracted national media attention after one of his parishioners showed up at an Arizona townhall meeting, that was attended by President Barack Obama, carrying a bullhorn and an AR15 semiautomatic assault rifle. One day before the event, Anderson gave a sermon entitled "Why I hate Barack Obama," in which the pastor declared he was praying for Obama's death and called on God to "melt" the president like a "[salted] snail."

It is not just the act of praying that can be abusive, but objecting to the ritual of prayer can be dangerous. Just ask the teenager in this report, who was demeaned by teachers and fellow students, and shunned by his own parents:

Damon Fowler, an atheist student at Bastrop High School in Louisiana, was about to graduate. His public school was planning to have a prayer as part of the graduation ceremony: as they traditionally did, as so many public schools around the country do every year. But Fowler -- knowing that government-sponsored prayer in the public schools is unconstitutional and legally forbidden -- contacted the school superintendent to let him know that he opposed the prayer, and would be contacting the ACLU if it happened. The school -- at first, anyway -- agreed, and canceled the prayer.
Then Fowler's name, and his role in this incident, was leaked. As a direct result:
1) Fowler has been hounded, pilloried, and ostracized by his community.
2) One of Fowler's teachers has publicly demeaned him.
3) Fowler has been physically threatened. Students have threatened to "jump him" at graduation practice, and he has received multiple threats of bodily harm, and even death threats.
4) Fowler's parents have cut off his financial support, kicked him out of the house, and thrown his belongings onto the front porch.
Oh, and by the way? They went ahead and had the graduation prayer anyway.

Praying can also be abusive when it is used in exorcisms, whether they are informal rituals  or formalized  ceremonies. Either way, exorcism and everything associated with it is ritual abuse. As with other types of abuses discussed here, ritual abuse can also be categorized under spiritual or physical abuse, both of which occur in faith healings and exorcisms.

Some religious rituals, such as those associated with superstitions like demon possession, Satanism  and witchcraft, can harm children either directly or indirectly. Some children accused of being witches or possessed  are subjected to exorcism rituals and injured or killed in the process, but other children are kidnapped, trafficked, mutilated and killed so their body parts can be used in occult rituals. Child trafficking is also associated with another type of religious ritual abuse in which underage girls, so called child brides,  are 'married' to older men for religious reasons. Corporal punishment can also be used in a ritualistic way, such as when religious authorities beat and humiliate children to make them feel worthless.

Not all religious ritual abuse takes the above forms, however. Sometimes religious rituals are used in sacrilegious ways. Here are a few examples of how priests used the religious ritual of confession to sexually abuse children. One of the Jesuit order's most notorious convicted pedophiles, Donald McGuire, used confession to groom his victims.

According to a sentencing memorandum filed by federal prosecutors after McGuire's conviction, one of his primary means of "grooming" young abuse victims was the ritual of confession.

For example, when the primary victim in the case confessed to McGuire at the age of 13 that he masturbated, McGuire "seized on it" and said the boy had an "addiction" that could send him to hell, according to court documents. He then demanded to "inspect" the boy's penis using a magnifying glass and baby oil.

Brian Spillane, a notorious convicted Australian priest who still faces over 100 charges of child abuse, sexually abused girls in their own homes while their parents were there and raped boys at the school where he taught. Many of his victims said the abuse occurred during prayer sessions, and like McGuire, he also used the ritual of confession to groom his victims.

Molesting girls in the confessional box and raping hypnotised boys was part of a pattern of "rampant pedophilia" by a former priest accused of sexually assaulting youngsters, a Sydney court has been told.

During confession he would invite children as young as eight to sit on his lap. "It was my pastoral approach,'' he told the court, "to break down the barrier between the fearful God and the loving God." One former penitent gave evidence of him holding her tightly on his lap as he nuzzled into her neck. "What I felt was some little kisses."

Italian priest, Ruggero Conti, charged with sexual violence and prostitution involving seven boys, also used the ritual of confession in his crimes.

Earlier at the hearing, Marongiu told the court Conti frequently made advances to him when he was 13 years old in all sorts of places, including in a car and during confession. He said it did not happen in the confessional booth, and that Conti would hear confession anywhere at any time.


Residential Schools, boarding schools, teen detention centres:


Much of the religion related abuse of children reported in this archive occurred in residential or boarding schools maintained by religious institutions. Sometimes these abuses occurred as a result of neglectful oversight in boarding schools for children of missionaries, but most often the abuse was intentionally and systematically directed against institutionalized children. Abusive priestspastorsmonks and nuns had captive children that they not only committed all kinds of physical, sexual, psychological and spiritual abuses against with impunity, but also engaged in cultural assimilation  and class warfare. These institutions destroyed the cultural identities of Indian and Aborigine children or enslaved orphans or the children of the poor. This institutional abuse of innocent, indigenous or indigent children is a national shame for Canada, the United States, Britain, Australia, Germany and any other country where this extremely abusive form of evangelism occurred.

Related to this is the troubled teen industry, where so called delinquent teens are sent to detention centres, boot-camps or other tough love programs that almost always are religious in nature or have some religious elements. As with boarding schools, captive children with no way to escape are hypocritically subjected to cruel abuse in order to indoctrinate them against their will.


Apologetics:


This category could be considered a sub-category of spiritual abuse. There is something particularly vile about religious leaders making excuses and justifications for child abuse. Catholic leaders are very good at that, coming up with all kinds of excuses including blaming victims or society, but rarely taking the blame  themselves for neglecting to protect children. It is never the PopeCardinalsBishops  or Catholic doctrines   that are at fault, but just a few bad apples. That is an excuse common to other religious groups , as are the inadequate apologies that are often offered without corresponding action such as compensating survivors  or ensuring effective child protection policies are in place to prevent future abuse. Those apologies are often expressed in a passive form  such as “mistakes were made”, which deflects accountability away from the abusers and their enablers.

Another despicable type of apologetics is when believers argue for their religious right to discriminate  or abuse children. When they are denied that right they are quick to claim religious persecution. A few examples in this archive include: faith healers  who claim religious freedom to let children die,  fundamentalists who claim religious freedom  to sexually and spiritually abuse little girls in so called marriages, parents who claim religious freedom to beat or mutilate their children, fundamentalists who claim religious freedom to intellectually abuse children, evangelicals who claim religious freedom to convert and indoctrinate children, and so on. Believers who make those claims do not understand the concept of religious freedom, which includes the right to be free from religion,  otherwise it is an empty right.  It means absolute freedom to believe or not believe, but it does not mean absolute freedom to act on those beliefs. Religious freedom does not give anyone the right, including parents, to harm children or deny them their own rights  and religious freedom. And when those same believers claim religious persecution they are blind to the fact that they are religiously persecuting children by denying them their own internationally recognized rights (by all countries except the U.S.  and Somalia). So, claims of religious persecution should be considered skeptically. When fundamentalist Christians, for example, claim religious persecution it is often self serving because the Bible tells them in 2 Timothy 3:12 that if they live godly they will be persecuted. It is a badge of honour, so when they claim to be religiously persecuted they see it as a sign that they must doing something good. However, often the so-called persecuted are in fact the persecutors.



10 Jun 2011

Forced marriage of children is widespread but some child brides are fighting back against powerful religions and traditions



National Geographic - June 2011

Too Young to Wed


The secret world of child brides

By Cynthia Gorney


Because the wedding was illegal and a secret, except to the invited guests, and because marriage rites in Rajasthan are often conducted late at night, it was well into the afternoon before the three girl brides in this dry farm settlement in the north of India began to prepare themselves for their sacred vows. They squatted side by side on the dirt, a crowd of village women holding sari cloth around them as a makeshift curtain, and poured soapy water from a metal pan over their heads. Two of the brides, the sisters Radha and Gora, were 15 and 13, old enough to understand what was happening. The third, their niece Rajani, was 5. She wore a pink T-shirt with a butterfly design on the shoulder. A grown-up helped her pull it off to bathe.

The grooms were en route from their own village, many miles away. No one could afford an elephant or the lavishly saddled horses that would have been ceremonially correct for the grooms' entrance to the wedding, so they were coming by car and were expected to arrive high-spirited and drunk. The only local person to have met the grooms was the father of the two oldest girls, a slender gray-haired farmer with a straight back and a drooping mustache. This farmer, whom I will call Mr. M, was both proud and wary as he surveyed guests funneling up the rocky path toward the bright silks draped over poles for shade; he knew that if a nonbribable police officer found out what was under way, the wedding might be interrupted mid-ceremony, bringing criminal arrests and lingering shame to his family.

Rajani was Mr. M's granddaughter, the child of his oldest married daughter. She had round brown eyes, a broad little nose, and skin the color of milk chocolate. She lived with her grandparents. Her mother had moved to her husband's village, as rural married Indian women are expected to do, and this husband, Rajani's father, was rumored to be a drinker and a bad farmer. The villagers said it was the grandfather, Mr. M, who loved Rajani most; you could see this in the way he had arranged a groom for her from the respectable family into which her aunt Radha was also being married. This way she would not be lonely after her gauna, the Indian ceremony that marks the physical transfer of a bride from her childhood family to her husband's. When Indian girls are married as children, the gauna is supposed to take place after puberty, so Rajani would live for a few more years with her grandparents—and Mr. M had done well to protect this child in the meantime, the villagers said, by marking her publicly as married.

These were things we learned in a Rajasthan village during Akha Teej, a festival that takes place during the hottest months of spring, just before the monsoon rains, and that is considered an auspicious time for weddings. We stared miserably at the 5-year-old Rajani as it became clear that the small girl in the T-shirt, padding around barefoot and holding the pink plastic sunglasses someone had given her, was also to be one of the midnight ceremony's brides. The man who had led us to the village, a cousin to Mr. M, had advised us only that a wedding was planned for two teenage sisters. That in itself was risky to disclose, as in India girls may not legally marry before age 18. But the techniques used to encourage the overlooking of illegal weddings—neighborly conspiracy, appeals to family honor—are more easily managed when the betrothed girls have at least reached puberty. The littlest daughters tend to be added on discreetly, their names kept off the invitations, the unannounced second or third bride at their own weddings.

Rajani fell asleep before the ceremonials began. An uncle lifted her gently from her cot, hoisted her over one of his shoulders, and carried her in the moonlight toward the Hindu priest and the smoke of the sacred fire and the guests on plastic chairs and her future husband, a ten-year-old boy with a golden turban on his head.

The outsider's impulse toward child bride rescue scenarios can be overwhelming: Snatch up the girl, punch out the nearby adults, and run. Just make it stop. Above my desk, I have taped to the wall a photograph of Rajani on her wedding night. In the picture it's dusk, six hours before the marriage ceremony, and her face is turned toward the camera, her eyes wide and untroubled, with the beginnings of a smile. I remember my own rescue fantasies roiling that night—not solely for Rajani, whom I could have slung over my own shoulder and carried away alone, but also for the 13- and the 15-year-old sisters who were being transferred like requisitioned goods, one family to another, because a group of adult males had arranged their futures for them.

The people who work full-time trying to prevent child marriage, and to improve women's lives in societies of rigid tradition, are the first to smack down the impertinent notion that anything about this endeavor is simple. Forced early marriage thrives to this day in many regions of the world—arranged by parents for their own children, often in defiance of national laws, and understood by whole communities as an appropriate way for a young woman to grow up when the alternatives, especially if they carry a risk of her losing her virginity to someone besides her husband, are unacceptable.

Child marriage spans continents, language, religion, caste. In India the girls will typically be attached to boys four or five years older; in Yemen, Afghanistan, and other countries with high early marriage rates, the husbands may be young men or middle-aged widowers or abductors who rape first and claim their victims as wives afterward, as is the practice in certain regions of Ethiopia. Some of these marriages are business transactions, barely adorned with additional rationale: a debt cleared in exchange for an 8-year-old bride; a family feud resolved by the delivery of a virginal 12-year-old cousin. Those, when they happen to surface publicly, make for clear and outrage-inducing news fodder from great distances away. The 2008 drama of Nujood Ali, the 10-year-old Yemeni girl who found her way alone to an urban courthouse to request a divorce from the man in his 30s her father had forced her to marry, generated worldwide headlines and more recently a book, translated into 30 languages: I am Nujood, Age 10 and Divorced.

But inside a few of the communities in which parent-arranged early marriage is common practice—amid the women of Rajani's settlement, for example, listening to the mournful sound of their songs to the bathing brides—it feels infinitely more difficult to isolate the nature of the wrongs being perpetrated against these girls. Their educations will be truncated not only by marriage but also by rural school systems, which may offer a nearby school only through fifth grade; beyond that, there's the daily bus ride to town, amid crowded-in, predatory men. The middle school at the end of the bus ride may have no private indoor bathroom in which an adolescent girl can attend to her sanitary needs. And schooling costs money, which a practical family is surely guarding most carefully for sons, with their more readily measurable worth. In India, where by long-standing practice most new wives leave home to move in with their husbands' families, the Hindi term paraya dhan refers to daughters still living with their own parents. Its literal meaning is "someone else's wealth."

Remember this too: The very idea that young women have a right to select their own partners—that choosing whom to marry and where to live ought to be personal decisions, based on love and individual will—is still regarded in some parts of the world as misguided foolishness. Throughout much of India, for example, a majority of marriages are still arranged by parents. Strong marriage is regarded as the union of two families, not two individuals. This calls for careful negotiation by multiple elders, it is believed, not by young people following transient impulses of the heart.

So in communities of pressing poverty, where nonvirgins are considered ruined for marriage and generations of ancestors have proceeded in exactly this fashion—where grandmothers and great-aunts are urging the marriages forward, in fact, insisting, I did it this way and so shall she—it's possible to see how the most dedicated anti-child-marriage campaigner might hesitate, trying to fathom where to begin. "One of our workers had a father turn to him, in frustration," says Sreela Das Gupta, a New Delhi health specialist who previously worked for the International Center for Research on Women (ICRW), one of several global nonprofits working actively against early marriage. "This father said, 'If I am willing to get my daughter married late, will you take responsibility for her protection?' The worker came back to us and said, 'What am I supposed to tell him if she gets raped at 14?' These are questions we don't have answers to."

I heard the story of the rat and the elephant one day in early summer, some weeks into my time among girls who are expected to marry very young. I was in the backseat of a small car in remote western Yemen, traveling along with a man named Mohammed, who had offered to bring us to a particular village down the road.

"What happened in this village has given me strong feelings," he said. "There was a girl here. Ayesha is her name." The Prophet Muhammad's youngest wife was also named Ayesha, but this was not of interest to our Mohammed just now. He was extremely angry. "She is 10 years old," he said. "Very tiny. The man she married is 50 years old, with a big belly, like so." Spreading his arm around him, he indicated massive girth. "Like a rat getting married to an elephant."

Mohammed described the arrangement called shighar, in which two men provide each other with new brides by exchanging female relatives. "These men married each other's daughters," Mohammed said. "If the ages had been proper between the husbands and new wives, I don't think anyone would have reported it. But girls should not marry when they are 9 or 10. Maybe 15 or 16."

Fifty families live in the rock and concrete houses of the village we visited, between cactus stands and dry furrowed farm plots. The local leader, or sheikh, was short and red-bearded, with a mobile phone jammed under his belt beside his traditional Yemeni dagger. He showed us to a low-ceilinged house crowded with women, babies, and girls. They sat on the carpeted floors and beds, and more kept ducking through the doorway to squeeze in; the sheikh squatted in their midst, frowning and interrupting. He regarded me dubiously. "You have children?" he asked.

Two, I said, and the sheikh looked dismayed. "Only two!" He tipped his head toward a young woman nursing a baby in one arm while fending off two small children with the other. "This young lady is 26," he said. "She has had ten."

Her name was Suad. The sheikh was her father. She had been married at 14 to a cousin he selected. "I liked him," Suad said, her voice low, as the sheikh kept his eyes upon her. "I was happy."

The sheikh made various pronouncements concerning marriage. He said no father ever forces his daughter to marry against her will. He said the medical dangers of early childbirth were greatly exaggerated. He said initiation to marriage was not necessarily easy, from the bride's point of view, but that it was pointless to become agitated about this. "Of course every girl gets scared the first night," the sheikh said. "She gets used to it. Life goes on."

His phone tootled. He extracted it from his belt and stepped outside. I pulled the scarf off my hair, something I'd seen my interpreter do when men were gone and the intimate talk of women was under way. Speaking quickly, we asked, How are you all prepared for your wedding night? Are you taught what to expect?

The women glanced toward the doorway, where the sheikh was absorbed in his phone call. They leaned forward. "The girls do not know," one said. "The men know, and they force them."

Could they tell us about young Ayesha and her elephant husband of 50? The women all started talking at once: It was an awful thing; it should have been forbidden, but they were helpless to stop it. Little Ayesha screamed when she saw the man she was to marry, said a young woman named Fatima, who turned out to be Ayesha's older sister. Someone alerted the police, but Ayesha's father ordered her to put on high heels to look taller and a veil to hide her face. He warned that if he was sent to jail, he would kill Ayesha when he got out. The police left without troubling anyone, and at present—the women talked urgently and quietly now, because the sheikh appeared to be ending his conversation—Ayesha was living in a village two hours away, married.

"She has a mobile phone," Fatima said. "Every day, she calls me and cries."

"If there were any danger in early marriage, Allah would have forbidden it," a Yemeni member of parliament named Mohammed Al-Hamzi told me in the capital city of Sanaa one day. "Something that Allah himself did not forbid, we cannot forbid." Al-Hamzi, a religious conservative, is vigorously opposed to the legislative efforts in Yemen to prohibit marriage for girls below a certain age (17, in a recent version), and so far those efforts have met with failure. Islam does not permit marital relations before a girl is physically ready, he said, but the Holy Koran contains no specific age restrictions and so these matters are properly the province of family and religious guidance, not national law. Besides, there is the matter of the Prophet Muhammad's beloved Ayesha—nine years old, according to the conventional account, when the marriage was consummated.

Other Yemeni Muslims invoked for me the scholarly argument that Ayesha was actually older when she had marital relations—perhaps a teenager, perhaps 20 or more. In any case her precise age is irrelevant, they would add firmly; any modern-day man demanding marriage with a young girl dishonors the faith. "In Islam, the human body is very valuable," said Najeeb Saeed Ghanem, chairman of the Yemeni Parliament's Health and Population Committee. "Like jewelry." He listed some of the medical consequences of forcing girls into sex and childbirth before they are physically mature: Ripped vaginal walls. Fistulas, the internal ruptures that can lead to lifelong incontinence. Girls in active labor to whom nurses must explain the mechanics of human reproduction. "The nurses start by asking, 'Do you know what's happening?'" a Sanaa pediatrician told me. "'Do you understand that this is a baby that has been growing inside of you?'"

Yemeni society has no tradition of candor about sex, even among educated mothers and daughters. The reality of these marriages—the murmured understanding that some parents truly are willing to deliver their girls to grown men—was rarely talked about openly until three years ago, when ten-year-old Nujood Ali suddenly became the most famous anti-child-marriage rebel in the world. Among Yemenis the great surprise in the Nujood story was not that Nujood's father had forced her to marry a man three times her age; nor that the man forced himself upon her the first night, despite supposed promises to wait until she was older, so that in the morning Nujood's new mother- and sister-in-law examined the bloodied sheet approvingly before lifting her from bed to give her a bath. No. Nothing in those details was especially remarkable. The surprise was that Nujood fought back.

"Her case was, you know, the stone that disturbed the water," says one of the Yemeni journalists who began writing about Nujood after she showed up alone one day in a courthouse in Sanaa. She had escaped her husband and come home. She had defied her father when he shouted at her that the family's honor depended on her fulfilling her wifely obligations. Her own mother was too cowed to intervene. It was her father's second wife who finally gave Nujood a blessing and taxi money and told her where to go, and when an astonished judge asked her what she was doing in the big city courthouse by herself, Nujood said she wanted a divorce. A prominent female Yemeni attorney took up Nujood's case. News stories began appearing in English, first in Yemen and then internationally; both the headlines and Nujood herself were irresistible, and when she was finally granted her divorce, crowds in the Sanaa courthouse burst into applause. She was invited to the United States, to be honored before more cheering audiences.

Everyone Nujood met was bowled over by her unnerving combination of gravity and poise. When I met her in a Sanaa newspaper office, she was wearing a third-grader-size black abaya, the full covering Yemeni women use in public after puberty. Even though she had now traveled across the Atlantic and back and been grilled by scores of inquisitive grown-ups, she was as sweet and direct as if my questions were brand-new to her. At lunch she snuggled in beside me as we sat on prayer mats and showed me how to dip my flat bread into the shared pot of stew. She said she was living at home again and attending school (her father, publicly excoriated, had grudgingly taken her back), and in her notebooks she was composing an open letter to Yemeni parents: "Don't let your children get married. You'll spoil their educations, and you'll spoil their childhoods if you let them get married so young."

Social change theory has a fancy label for individuals like Nujood Ali: "positive deviants," the single actors within a community who through some personal combination of circumstance and moxie are able to defy tradition and instead try something new, perhaps radically so. Amid the international campaigns against child marriage, positive deviants now include the occasional mother, father, grandmother, teacher, village health worker, and so on—but some of the toughest are the rebel girls themselves, each of their stories setting off new rebellions in its wake. In Yemen I met 12-year-old Reem, who obtained her divorce a few months after Nujood's; in doing so she won over a hostile judge who had insisted, memorably, that so young a bride is not yet mature enough to make a decision about divorce. In India I met the 13-year-old Sunil, who at 11 swore to her parents that she would refuse the groom who was about to arrive; if they tried force, she declared, she would denounce them to police and break her father's head. "She came to us for help," an admiring neighbor told me. "She said, 'I'm going to smash his head with a stone.'"

The push to reach many more underage girls and their families, through education programs and scattered government or agency-supported efforts, is targeted way beyond just the prepubescent marriages that most easily rouse public indignation. "The public loves those kinds of stories, where there's a clear right and wrong," says Saranga Jain, an adolescent-health specialist. "But the majority of girls getting married underage are 13 to 17. We want to recharacterize the problem as not just about very young girls."

From the ICRW's point of view, any marriage of a teen under 18 is a child marriage, and although definitive tallies are impossible, researchers estimate that every year 10 to 12 million girls in the developing world marry that young. Efforts to reduce this number are mindful of the varied forces pushing a teenager to marry and begin childbearing, thus killing her chances at more education and decent wages. Coercion doesn't always come in the form of domineering parents. Sometimes girls bail out on their childhoods because it's expected of them or because their communities have nothing else to offer. What seems to work best, when marriage-delaying programs do take hold, is local incentive rather than castigation: direct inducements to keep girls in school, along with schools they can realistically attend. India trains village health workers called sathins, who monitor the well-being of area families; their duties include reminding villagers that child marriage is not only a crime but also a profound harm to their daughters. It was a Rajasthan sathin, backed by the sathin's own enlightened in-laws, who persuaded the 11-year-old Sunil's parents to give up the marriage plan and let her go back to school.

Because the impossible flaw in the grab-the-girl-and-run fantasy is: Then what? "If we separate a girl and isolate her from her community, what will her life be like?" asks Molly Melching, the founder of a Senegal-based organization called Tostan, which has won international respect for its promotion of community-led programs that motivate people to abandon child marriage and female genital cutting. Tostan workers encourage communities to make public declarations of the standards for their children, so that no one girl is singled out as different if not married young.

"You don't want to encourage girls to run away," Melching says. "The way you change social norms is not by fighting them or humiliating people and saying they're backward. We've seen that an entire community can choose very quickly to change. It's inspiring."

The one person who explained most eloquently to me the excruciating balance required to grow up both independent and respectful within a culture of early marriage was a 17-year-old Rajasthan girl named Shobha Choudhary. Shobha was in her school uniform, a dark pleated skirt with a tucked-in white blouse, the first time I met her. She had severe eyebrows, an erect bearing, and shiny black hair combed into a ponytail. She was in her final year of high school and a scholarly standout; in her village she had been spotted years earlier by the Veerni Project, which disperses workers throughout northern India in search of bright girls whose parents might let them leave home for a free education at its girls' boarding school in the city of Jodhpur.

Shobha is married and has been since she was eight. Picture the occasion: a group ceremony, a dozen village girls, great excitement in a place of great poverty. "Beautiful new clothes," Shobha told me, with a mirthless smile. "I didn't know the meaning of marriage. I was very happy."

Yes, she said, she had seen her young husband since the wedding. But only briefly. He is a few years older. So far she had managed to postpone the gauna, the transition to married life in his household. She looked away when I asked her impression of him and said, he is not educated. We regarded each other, and she shook her head; there was no possibility, none, that she would disgrace her parents by delaying the gauna forever: "I have to be with him. I'll make him study and understand things. But I will not leave him."

She wanted to go to college, she said. Her intense wish was to qualify for the Indian police force so she could specialize in enforcement of the child marriage prohibition law. She had been keeping a diary throughout high school. One of the entries read, in carefully lettered Hindi: "In front of my eyes, I'll never ever allow child marriages to happen. I'll save each and every girl."

Every time I visited Shobha's village, her parents served chai, or spiced tea, in their best cups, and the Shobha stories thickened in their layers of pride and dissembling and uneasiness as to what the foreign visitor was up to. It wasn't a wedding! It was only an engagement party! All right, it was a wedding, but that was before the Veerni people made their kind offer and Shobha's capability had astounded them all. It was Shobha who had figured out how to obtain electricity for the house, so that she and her younger siblings could study after dark. "I can sign things," Shobha's mother told me. "She taught me how to write my name." And now, her parents indicated, this fine episode was surely concluding—and it was time. The husband was calling Shobha's cell phone, demanding a date. Her grandmother wanted the gauna before old age overcame her. The classes in Jodhpur were both Shobha's passion and her delaying tactic, but Veerni support runs only through high school; to stay on and cover the cost of college, Shobha needed a donor. The email arrived after I'd returned to the United States: "How are you I miss you Mam. Mam I am pursuing B.A. 1st year I also want to do English spoken course and computer course. Please reply mam fastly it is urgent for admission date in college."

My husband and I made the donation. "Let's see what happens," Shobha had said to me, the last time I saw her in India. "Whatever will be, I have to adjust. Because women have to sacrifice." We were in the cooking room of her family's home that afternoon, and my voice rose more than I intended: Why must women be the ones to sacrifice, I asked, and the look Shobha gave me suggested that only one of us, at that moment, understood the world in which she lives. "Because our country is man-oriented," she said.

She has completed more than a year now of post–high school study: computer training, preparation for the police exams. I receive emails from her occasionally—her English is halting but improving—and recently my Jodhpur Hindi interpreter borrowed a video camera and sat down with her, on my behalf, in a city café. Shobha said she was studying for the next exam. She had lodgings in a safe girls' hostel in the city. Her husband still called frequently. No gauna had yet taken place. She looked straight into the camera at one point, and in English, an enormous smile on her face, she said, "Nothing is impossible, Cynthia Mam. Everything is possible."

Two days after I received the video, a dispatch arrived from Yemen. Newspapers were reporting that a bride from a village had been dropped off at a Sanaa hospital four days after her wedding. Sexual intercourse appeared to have ruptured the girl's internal organs, hospital officials said. She had bled to death. She was 13 years old.

This article was found at:



RELATED ARTICLES ON THIS BLOG




Islamic leaders in Azerbaijan provide religious ceremonies for illegal child bride marriages



Pakistan police arrest six for contracting marriage for girls aged 3 and 6 to settle family feud caused by brother


Internationally awarded children's rights advocate empowers and protects African girls from rape and forced marriage







Author gives overview of history of marriage in context of the Canadian constitutional case on polygamy law


The Best Way to Curb Forced Marriages


Two Zimbabwe senators tell parliamentary committee marrying underage girls is their religious right


Zimbabwe advocates campaign against widespread child 'marriages' in Christian sect that practices polygamy


GENDER-ZIMBABWE: Religion and Poverty Force Girls into Early Marriages


Child 'marriages' rampant in Middle East and North Africa despite most countries having minimum age laws


Saudi Arabia's strange paradox - 10 year old girls can be 'married' but adult women can be prevented from marrying


Canadian citizen held against her will highlights abusive Saudi Arabia system that makes women children for life


Saudis Annul One Case of Child "Marriage" But Law And Custom Still Allow Child "Brides"


8-year-old Saudi girl divorces 50-year-old husband 


Senior Saudi cleric OKs girls to marry


The words of God do not justify cruelty to girls and women


Another child 'bride' dies in Yemen, Islamic leaders strongly oppose any law against forced marriage of minors 


With no minimum age in Yemen, forced child-bride marriages result in children having children


12-year-old child 'bride' dies during painful child-birth, baby dies too 


Broken lives: Nigeria's child brides who end up on the streets


Nigerian Senate investigates Senator who reportedly payed for 13 year old Egyptian 'bride'


Sharia law condoning child 'marriages' undermines Nigeria's children's rights laws


Child-Sex Case Grips Turkey Amid Religious Young-Brides Split


Revised Afghan marriage law still allows child brides and violence towards women


UN report says child brides, forced marriage, slavery, extreme violence against women widespread in Afghanistan


Malaysian conference considers the problems of child brides in a progressive Islamic state


Malaysian government says it cannot legislate against child marriages allowed under Sharia law, activists disagree


Two Malaysian child 'brides' separated from their 'husbands' while religious authorities investigate Islamic cult


Indonesian Muslim cleric gets 4 years for child 'bride' sex abuse, court uses child protection law instead of marriage law


Child 'brides' common in rural Indonesia despite harsh laws, Muslim cleric who 'married' girl faces soft sentence


Indonesian child-abuse police to investigate wealthy Muslim cleric


Indonesian religious teacher married to 12 year old, plans to marry two other minors


Indonesian court acquits Muslim cleric who claimed Islam allowed him to marry 12 year old girl


Indonesian child protection system ill-equipped to deal with religion related child abuse


Indonesian Women's Association divided on whether polygamy, which is legal in Indonesia, is harmful to women and children


Don’t use religion to justify abuse!


Sharia law in UK gives Muslim women a chance to escape unhappy marriages, but fails to grant them equal status


Child brides, lost boys and a jailed 'prophet': life inside the FLDS, a Mormon polygamist community


Book excerpt from Daphne Bramham's The Secret Lives of Saints: Child Brides and Lost Boys in Canada's Polygamous Mormon Sect


FLDS Polygamy Survivors: We didn’t have baby dolls as children. We had real babies instead.


Tony Alamo appeal of child sex abuse convictions set to start, parents still hiding 90 children from authorities


Child brides, lost boys and a jailed 'prophet': life inside the FLDS, a Mormon polygamist community


FLDS Polygamy Survivors: We didn’t have baby dolls as children. We had real babies instead. 


Missing: 12 children caught up in Australian doomsday cult that practices child 'brides' & stock-piles weapons for end of world


Forced marriage survivors tour UK in effort to stop annual abduction of hundreds of kids who are forced to marry overseas


Cult leader Tony Alamo wants new trial, claims sex with child 'brides' was not main reason for trip across state lines 


Montreal 'pastor' in jail for sex assault of 10-year-old girl he claimed he married, guilty of abusing another minor